Today 10/30/24 I turn 43 years old. So here are 43 thoughts about being 43.
1. After 40 your body hurts every day, so you can't just say you're tired to get out of stuff, because you're always tired now. 2. Take care of your hair in your youth; you'll never realize how important it is to meeting women in your 40's (whether you're single, divorced, or in the "inbetween"). 3. Fight Club is the national anthem of movies for men. 4. Drink a lot of coffee. You'll feel better and more alert during the day. Plus you'll pee and sh*t more. 5. God loves you, but like any parent, He doesn't always like you. So just try to be good, will you? 6. Frank Sinatra music is the best road music. I would know, I practically live in my car. 7. Girls with tattoos are just sexier than girls without tattoos. But women who refrain from marking their body are probably more stable and like their dad more. 8. It's better to be broke in Los Angeles than wealthy in the mid-west. Because, you know, winter. 9. The plot for Nightmare on Elm Street and Home Alone are basically the same by the third act. 10. Every boy should play a sport between 12-18 at least for one year to learn fair play and dedication. 11. Every girl should play a sport between 5-12, just so they can beat up boys and make them afraid of them by junior high. 12. Dating a Latina is like a box of chocolates...you never know what you're gonna get. 13. A good stack of pancakes is still the best breakfast in America. 14. The TV show Ted Lasso can change your life if you let it. 15. Horror films are the only genre pictures that are guaranteed to make you "feel" something, even if it's fear and dread. 16. Trust your grandpa when he tells you not to buy a Ford Truck with 50,000+ miles on it, even if you think Jen MacAuley will think it's hot. Because she won't and and it will break down. 17. Everything I learned in life, I learned first through wrestling. Both in competing and coaching. If you can volunteer for a decent local team, do it. It'll change your whole worldview. 18. Starbucks makes a delicious pumpkin muffin. 19. Play the MegaMillions every time it's over $300 million. It's just a buck. You deserve the opportunity. 20. I will continue to date women in their 20's, but I won't live and marry a woman until her 30's. They're nearly impossible to deal with in close quarters until about 29. 21. Everyone should read Life of Pi by Yann Martel. It's the best metaphor for life ever written. Plus it has the most chilling line I ever read: "Then normal sank." Boy is that true every day. 22. Check your tire pressure often. There's a reason the freeways are filled with ripped open rubber wheels. 23. Go to the movies alone. It's the most relaxing time you'll spend by yourself. Plus it's dark; no one notices you're alone. 24. Credit cards are like Latina women. They seem like a good idea at the time. But they come back to kill your credit. 25. Southern California Evangelical Churches will stop talking to you the day you leave the church for good or bad reasons. It's not personal. It's cultural. 26. Gossip with co-workers. And often. It's the only real reason to go to work. 27. Boobs are God's way for apologizing for making us work. 28. Take all the pictures you want on your iPhone. Just don't post all of them on Instagram. 29. The New York Yankees and Los Angeles Dodgers are the best franchises in sports history. F**k Boston! 30. Top five NBA players of all time are Magic Johnson, Michael Jordan, Larry Bird, Bill Russell, and Lebron James. Not in that particular order. 31. Please keep your dog on a leash in public. Yes, they're YOUR child, but you feed them. We are a threat to them. 32. Loving your enemy is hard. But do it any way. 33. Go to Disneyland as an adult. But only if you went as a kid. If your first time is after 25, you're gonna keep asking "Does it get better?" 34. Matt Walsh of The Daily Wire is a penis face head whose breath smells like urine. But I love him anyways, because he's my enemy. 35. Donald Trump gave evangelicals and hard core Catholics the freedom to hate immigrants out loud. He's the poop in the pool. 36. If I wasn't a Christian, I'd be a heathen. All the other religions really don't look that fun. 37. Democrats needs Roe v. Wade to say they're not pro-abortion, just pro-choice. The way Republicans needed a conservative Supreme Court to legalize gay marriage so they can love their gay kids openly. Because we all hide behind the law. 38. In writing for the VC Reporter for 16 years, I've noticed through letters sent to me, conservatives have terrible grammar and lefties like swearing more. 39. The UFC might be barbaric and overtly violent, but it keeps men at bay. Trust me, a world where men can't watch fights or be in them would be a nightmare. 40. It's okay to get really high when watching The Big Lebowski, The Wizard of Oz, or any Stanley Krubrick film. 41. Siskel & Ebert is really the best 30 minute show ever produced, because they're discussing something every important - how one should spend their weekend. 42. 42 is the most important number in the universe and the answer to everything. 43. No matter how you live your life, you can still be hated. Jesus fed all the people. Jesus heled all the people. Jesus loved all the people. They still put Him on a cross. He knew it and it didn't stop Him anyway. Go and do likewise.
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Paul Douglas Moomjean Blog's About What's on His MindBlogging allows for me to rant when there is no stage in the moment to talk about what's important and/or funny to me. Archives
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