Why I hate Black Friday

Black Friday is a weird holiday. It combines three things I usually don't like doing:

1. Waking up early on a day off

2. Having to give over my money

3. Being surrounded by loud, angry people

If I wanted to get up early, give away my money, and look puzzled at those around me, I'd go to Disneyland, or a family reunion. I'm kidding about the first one.

Actually, Black Friday is the worst day of the year. People act like they survived WWII after shopping from 2am to 10am. Or what I call the Normandy attack.

My family used to get really organized, we'd have our mission, and then my grandma would channel Tom Hanks and say, "and I'll see you on the beach!" Then we do what Americans have been doing best for 200 years. Get into debt!